TJ & Kimbally #2:
Back in Jaipur….
There is Soooo maaaach fighting still going on (I want to jump through the screen and say “Don’t have a cow!”, but then I’d probably be trampled by one of the rogue cows that always seems to be walking by during filming…)
TJ and Kimbally were upstairs dealing with the fallout from Kimbally wearing jeans with holes in the knees (Listen Kimbally, the only thing that’s holy in India are cows, not jeans). Though she claimed Mother TJ had seen her wear these particularly horrible pants many times before, this time they only added to the “10 Things I Hate About Kimbally” poem Brother Yash had read to his mom. As luck would have it, Kim was scheduled to be staying in a hotel for the next few nights, as per the Hindu wedding traditions, and it couldn’t have come at a better time. She felt that being away from all of the fighting and negativity was exactly what she needed, though she felt bad about leaving TJ. As she was about to get into a cab, TJ asked her to make up with Yash by shaking hands, which she was adamantly against. Yash also didn’t want to play nice, claiming that Kimbally asked him not to touch her and he was taking that into the next 3 lifetimes. (Too bad she couldn’t see any of this coming…) Poor TJ felt stuck in between his family and his fiancé, and wasn’t sure of what to do.
Kimbally arrived at her hotel, happy to have some alone time, but anxiously awaiting the arrival of her parents. Father and Stepmother Kim finally landed in Jaipur, and were greeted warmly by the Jaipur Hilton staff (5 stars on yelp, for sure). Kimbally tried to hide her tears, as she was emotional over the current family struggles, feeling embarrassed that things weren’t going as planned. While shopping for some wedding gear, she finally spilled the beans about her fight with Yash to her parents, explaining her hesitations about becoming part of the Family TJ. Father Kimbally’s eyes flashed, probably thinking about all of the money he just wasted traveling across the world and all of the 6 diarrheas he was about to have during lunch, only to hear his daughter was unhappy. He let Kimbally know that she always has the option of coming home any time, and didn’t have to feel stuck, if this doesn’t seem like the right fit. Though she felt better having her family there for support, Kim was unsure if she should go through with the wedding. (She should probably just slip one of the cows a $20 to go after Yash…)
Shekinah & Sarper-Image:
Shekinah was still in LA-LA land, hanging out with her sister, Shariyah (who was equally as full of filler and awkwardly named). Sister Shariyah helped her finish packing for her big move to Turkey to contract the clap. Shariyah had some reservations about her sister’s new love interest, as she’s seen a few red flags (more red than any inflamed areas from sleeping with 2500 women). Her main concerns were the fact that Sarper refuses to post any photos of Shekinah or acknowledge their relationship on social media, and often flexes his stance as an “alpha male”. Shekinah tried to reassure her sister Shenaynay that Sarper’s womanizing ways were adorable, and she should trust the process.
Shekinah’s daughter Sophia appeared, hanging out for a while before heading back to her boarding school, aka Hogwart’s. Apparently little Sophie overheard her aunt discussing the whole “alpha” thing, which creeped her out and took her off of #TeamSarper.
As they reached the airport, Sophie encouraged her mom to listen to her intuition and not let herself get caught up in yet another bad relationship. The wise words of her much younger counterpart made Shekinah’s eyes well up with tears, even though she was physically unable to cry, as she strutted off towards TSA in her tight pink leggings. Can’t wait to see the two human Instagram filters meet up. Something tells me Sarper will not disappoint…… (entertainment value-wise, not relationship-wise).
Holly & Wayne the Drain:
After their tumultuous fight and flight, Wayne and Holly were headed out for a nice dinner in a nicer looking restaurant. As they drove, Wayne tried to entertain Holly with a lame joke he probably got on the bottom of a popsicle stick, but she did not seem impressed (Stick to plumbing, Wayne). As they sat down and ordered drinks, Wayne decided to confess he needed to come clean about a few things. He admitted the plumbing bizz had been a bit slow since those new guys Mario & Luigi got in the game, and he now was in a bit of debt. Holly had a concerned look on her face (more than usual), as she reminded Wayne that she was upfront with him at the beginning about wanted to be with someone who could take care of her financially (She could always donate her hair for extra cash to SABZOA…Sad And Balding Zebras of Africa). Holly worried about their future together, as it was clear to her now that they’d most likely have to stay in the burglars’ favorite house, with all of the load shedding. Who knows… Maybe Wayne will strike it big with his Crypto… and if that doesn’t work out, he can always invest in Pogs.
Karmando:
This week, Mother Armando was taking little kewpie doll Hannah back to her hometown so she could spend time with her family, and the “dos papas” (That’s “two dads”, Kenny), would have a little time to themselves. Once everyone left, Kenny decided they should hit up a gay club for a night of fun. Being from a small town, Armando had never been to a gay bar, and needed a drink or 2 to loosen up…especially when the strip show started. Armando’s eyes lit up like Christmas morning watching the faux policia take it all off, really showing off his weapon. The nice man-dancer even came over to give both he and Kendoll lap dances. Though Armando claimed to be clueless, he did admit he has a wild streak (Like that one time he was crafting and cut something outside of the lines….). Kenny was happy to see Armando letting loose, and was sure this stripclub would be a “pro” on the checklist of reasons to move to Mexico City. I’m just hoping Kenny didn’t accidentally activate “Mondo”, Armando’s bad-boy personality, who’s going to spend his weekends on stage at the club. This whole episode felt like an 80s movie; Armando’s glasses were about to come off and he was going to suddenly become the cool guy that no one realized was cool, though he was there the whole time.
Daniele & Yo-Hon:
After visiting the fertility clinic, the two went out for dinner to discuss what to do next. Yohan decided to hire a translator for the occasion to make sure the couple thoroughly understood each other (Instead of the Jihoon translator, though that thing is more fun). He brought Translator Giselle, who helped to successfully relay the message that Yohan wanted to wait for a few months to have a baby. Daniele expressed the difficulties in procreating due to her age (Not even taking into account the sheer potential size of a baby Yohan), and she feels discouraged every month that they have tried naturally. The translator also helped to explain to Yohan that Daniele loves his family and the way they do things, but that she would want to do things exactly the opposite because she cares about the potential child’s future. The talk seemed to have worked, as both parties were smiling and getting along for a change. I wonder if Baby Yo-yell will be born with waist-length extensions….