Before the 90 Days of Our Lives: Episode 7

Rebecca & Zied:
The episode starts with a leisurely stroll through a Tunisian marketplace, where Zied can be heard saying his 2 phrases; “It is so much beautiful” and “I love so much”. Followed by a cat maybe or maybe not using a spice bin as his litter box. Note to self; Do not eat anything spiced in Tunisia.
Later they went to meet the sister Zied. She was “so much bitchy” to Rebecca, who had a pound puppy look on her face throughout the entire episode. It was so thoughtful of Rebecca to bring her spicy cat crap as a gift, though.
Lastly, while yet again “hookah-ing”, Rebecca confesses to Zied that she was previously with a woman. This makes Zied have less expression than he normally lacks. It must be noted that his yellow sweater was 2 sizes too small, and revealed every nook and cranny. It makes him look so much squishy.

Ben & Quinoa:
Ben, would it have killed ya to stop by a litter box and pick up some spices for the family Quinoa?! Who doesn’t bring a present?! Ben is having a rough time winning over Fidel and the rest of the family, or so it seems. Quinoa is super mature about the whole thing, being that she wont see him and is leaving this poor guy alone in her scary brother’s house, to sing his hymns.

Angela & Michael:
Its day 2 in Nigeria and Angela is PISSED. They have hippos and rhinos in Africa, but at this point, I’d think Angela charging at you is more concerning. And what does any woman do when she’s angry? She goes to have her hair did, and talk smack. Doesn’t matter what country you’re in. New braids, who dis?!
After spending the night sleeping in his car, Michael tried to crash girl time with his apology cake (hey, it worked once) but only to end up wearing it on his face. Jerry Springer just went international.

Jiminey Cricket & Pao #2:
It seems these 2 are back in good standing after the drink-in-the face incident (which probably caused Tim to go home and exfoliate repeatedly). They did some sightseeing with her adorable daughter, Violet. Tim expressed that he thought they would make beautiful babies together, but I’m not sure if hes aware of how babies are made. Looks like next week will be more interesting for them.

Avery & Omar:
Well, Avery is having another tantrum about moving to the middle east again.
Her mom dropped a little truth on her, making her consider the fact that Omar could have sought her out for a Visa to get out of his war-torn country. Doesnt look like shes budging though. Her poor mother…

Darcy & Tom:
Darcy and Tom headed to Albania to meet Stacy and Florian (who were 40 minutes late to meet up and we got to look at the restaurant’s decorative corn for a long time). Tom was super pissy, and rightfully so. Darcy had some wine, so you know shes going to be crying in no time. We learned that Darcy has a “vision board”, which I’m guessing is a pinterest board, for her future. I tried looking her up under the username “Not_the_short_twin”, but nothing came up.
Stacy and Darcy have some major twin competition going on. Though they both have awful extensions, I must point out that I really liked Stacy’s ponytail better than Darcy’s comb over (although you know she only wore the high ponytail to gain 3″ on Darcy).
Poor Tom is probably assessing the risk of jumping off of the romantic Albanian bridge and swimming away.

Caesar:
Who’s Caesar? Whoever he is, I hope he enjoyed his free trip to Mexico.