Love After Lockup; S3, Ep 13

Heather & Dylan:

Heather and Dylan are still finishing up their high speed chase, as Dylan grabbed the keys from the ignition and jumped out. The crew helped him to get a ride home to regroup and meet up with his mother and aunt at a restaurant. Dylan’s family seemed extremely happy to see him, as he explained that they are very close, and had been supportive throughout his prison sentence. His mother waved a bright red flag, as she explained that Heather would get jealous when she tried visiting her son in prison and went on a rampage. Dylan’s mom and aunt urged him to come stay with them so he could get back on his feet, and get away from Heather and the evil clutches of Aunt Diane. Dylan explained it was easier said than done, as he appreciated Heather’s dedication and support for the 5 years he was in prison. Should be interesting to see what happens next when he goes back to get his toothbrush…

Destinee & Shawn:

After last week’s cliffhanger post-court date surprise proposal, Destinee seems to be in total shock. She said “yes” to Shawn’s romantic gesture, excited about getting her dream ring, and threatening to kill someone if anything bad happens. She tells Shawn that she wants to have a big wedding (possibly planning to invite all of cell block D), and it sounds like Shawn is going to need another 401k for this one. Though he is excited that Destinee accepted his proposal, he is also nervous, as the next step would be to introduce her to his family. He broached the topic of Destinie meeting his ex girlfriend/ baby mama Kelly, and Destinie was already hating the thought of it. Shawn explains that Kelly will have to meet Destinee in order for her to be introduced to his kids, so he’s kind of hoping things go smoothly, or else Destinie claimed he’d need a two for one deal on body bags.

Next we see Shawn pop a K cup to some dramatic music, as he and Destinie prepare for the lunch meeting with Kelly. Destinie drove his car (let’s hope she’s a better driver than Heather…) as they headed to the restaurant. I guess Destinie’s big issue is that she feels Kelly calls Shawn pretty often (though, Hi…. they do have 6 kids together). Of course the episode ended with the back of Kelly’s Feria dyed hair waltzing into the restaurant for the big meet up. Can’t wait for the  actual showdown!

Quaylon & Shovel:
Shovel and her cutie daughter are busy cooking dinner for their party of two, as Quaylon is far aquay in Houston. Quayvon was met by his two Q-sisters at the bar, where they had a few tricks up their sleeve; Setting Quaylon up with a friend of theirs. Quaycation reminded them that he was not looking for a blind date, as he had Shavel back home, but again- his family insisted that he keep his options open. They introduced him to their girlfriend, who had purple eyeshadow strategically placed everywhere except where eyeshadow goes. The whole time they were mingling, Shovel was blowing up Quaylon’s phone, trying to check in on her man. Circle-quay finally picked up the phone, denying that he was out on the town, as not to worry her, but she had seen a photo posted by one of the many Q sisters and caught him red handed.

He somehow made it seem like it was all Shovel’s fault that he was lying, which was a fun little twist of blame. Poor Shovel is just sitting at home, wondering “Will he Quay or will he go now?”

John & Kristianna:

Kristianna wanted one more chance to be alone with her new husband, so the two set out to get a hotel room where they could be away from John’s newly crowded home. On the drive to the Red Roof Inn, John and Kristianna were making small talk, where she incorrectly stated her husband’s age. Just goes to show how well they know each other, and how they should not hand in their application to be on “The Newlywed Game”.

Once they arrived at the hotel, Kristianna whispered her plans for some extracurricular activities that she planned on partaking in with John, which seemed to ruffle his jacket fringe. The two started getting hot and heavy, taking a break so a topless John could escort the camera crew out, while his hair flowed wildly in the wind. 

I suppose the evening was just as magical as one could only imagine, as it seemed that Kristianna preferred having an encore to turning herself back in. She claimed want one more day with her husband and family before the inevitable trip back to the big house. John, having enjoyed his delayed honeymoon, agreed that one more day together would be great, supported his wife’s decision, while her mother and sister begged to differ. Though they were happy to have Kristianna around, they worried that the longer she waited, the worse the repercussions would be (Also, they wanted their AirBNB host back to waiting on them exclusively)

Lindsey & Scott:

Last episode they completely skipped these two, and this episode they only gave them 5 minutes… what gives?! 

Anyway, this week Lindsay’s old friend Tara Belle is in town for a visit. Lindsey described her friend as her “rock”, as they had been through a lot together, including a BFF incarceration stint.

Tara Belle (which, when said fast could sound like “terrible”, an oversight on her mother’s part, I’m sure), admitted to production that Lindsey’s relationship with Scott was most certainly all about money, as most things seem to be with Lindsey. I’d like to spin this fact about Lindsey into a positive, and think of her as a real go-getter.Lindsey was thrilled that Tara Belle had brought her a kaboodle full of makeup as a “welcome home to some weird guy’s house” gift, and Lindsey whisked her off to give her the full house tour. The first stop was to see the progress made on Miley Grace’s bedroom, which was the converted room above the garage. Tara Belle questioned Lindsey on why she chose to be with Scott, not really understanding what they could possibly have in common, and noting that he didn’t seem too well off to be worth her while. The conversation left a bit open ended, when Lindsey was asked if Scott knew the truth about she and Terribble’s relationship, and we were left with a “to be continued” situation, like always.

Jessica & Maurice:

Jessica and her mom are heading to a bridal salon to do a little wedding dress shopping. Tiffany, Jessica’s maid-of-honor-to-be, met up with them as well. Jessica explained, through tears, that she hopes that her sister will attend the wedding and be supportive of her marriage to Maurice. She had explained earlier in the season that her sister had not been into the idea of Maurice, possibly because she doesn’t like the color blue, but most likely because he’s a felon. Her sister had shut her out of her life since the relationship began, which also meant that Jessica has been unable to see her niece as well. 

The first dress Jessica tried on was pretty tragic; A lumpy, off the shoulder number that did her not one favor. To get her ready to try on the next dress, the sales girl offered Jessica a glass of champagne, which she refused, causing her mother to become suspicious. Jessica came out and told her mother that she was in fact pregnant. Her mother seemed excited, though naturally worried given the circumstances. The second dress that Jessica tried on was the winner, as it fit her lady lumps quite nicely. Can’t wait to see the wedding, and if Maurice’s impressions of his relatives are accurate.