90 Day Fiance; Season 10 Episode 11:

Clayton & Anali:

With only 32 days until the wedding, Clayton and Anali set off to California to meet his best friend Kameron for the first time…..and escape from Mother Cupboard. They looked forward to a little human interaction, since Clayton had been cyber BFFs with Kameron for over 10 years but neglected to meet in person. As they headed to the airport, Anali worked on her pronunciation of “Kam-er-un” hoping it would be okay to refer to him as “Camaron” (Which means “shrimp” in Spanish, Kenny… and I’m sure you’re feeling the same as Clayton, that it would sound like she was referring to his package). 

Back in California, Kameron waited at the airport for his mail order bestie to arrive. The two friends ran to each other at the baggage claim, with an emotional hug covered up by “What’s up, Bro?!” (A friendship meetup at the baggage claim was the first of its kind in 90 Day history).
Anali was enjoying watching Clayton interact IRL (That’s short for “In Real Life”, Kenny, and it’s what the kids say nowadays), as she obtained her third wheel status. They talked as they drove, with Kameron dumping the pair off at their AirBNB so they could have a little alone time. Clayton upgraded their vacation rental in hopes that he would score enough points to finally score with Anali. Unfortunately for him, the change of scenery didn’t prove to be effective, as she seemed to push him away with every advance.

After settling in for a bit, the couple headed out to meet up with Kameron and his girlfriend ”Vy” for dinner at a nice looking restaurant that most likely didn’t serve guinea pig. Kameron opened the dinner conversation by asking about the wedding planning, seeming genuinely interested. Clayton did not hesitate to ask him to be his best man, which he gladly accepted (It was not confirmed if this position was to be held in person, or through an XBox). Clayton then brought up the couple’s sex life, or lack thereof, where he went into full details, as Anali sat there squirming in her chair.  She claimed the lack of sex was due to the close proximity with his closet mom, though Clayton begged to differ. He was annoyed that she was underwhelmed by the sexy Indiana getaway, and come-hither Rubik’s cube propositioning. The awkward tension was overwhelming, as Anali finally announced she was uncomfortable and wanted to leave. She felt Clayton was trying to be macho in front of his friends (though in fairness, he had never had friends so human interaction was still probably a new concept). 
Kameron and his girlfriend could tell that there’d be trouble ahead, as they hopefully spent the rest of the night dissecting the awkward event.

Rob the Knob & Dollar Store Daenerys Targaryen:
Back in the throne-less palace..
Sophie was laying on the communal futon, feeling like it still needed a few homey touches. She suggested they get a duvet (which she pronounced “DOO-vay” putting the wrong empha-sus on the wrong “syll-ah-bull”), which provoked a fight with Rob. The two argued back and forth, managing to say the word “DOOvay” 37 times in one conversation, sure to have caused inebriation if it were a drinking game.
Rob accused Sophie of being “bougie” for wanting a blanket, and snapped at her to use her family money instead of asking him to buy her things all the time. She ran out to the courtyard to text with her mum, tattle-telling on Rob for being as charming as usual.

After the early morning fighting, the two seemed to have smoothed things over just enough that they were still in the mood for a date night. Rob took Sophie to a brewery (which she also had a hard time pronouncing, but anything was better than DOOvey). As they sat down for a pint, they hashed out some of their recent issues, including but not limited to the bisexual non-drama, their ridiculous living conditions, and what they wanted to do about the future. Somehow they seemed to be getting along and were on the same page for a change.

In the next scene, Sophie (at the behest of production, I’m sure) took Rob to a sex store, like so many 90 Day couples before them. Sophie was hoping the visit would spice up their sex life, which was basically non-existent as of lately. Rob tried to play it off like he was the more adventurous one in the bedroom… a real Rico Suave (Which was rude to compare him to my favorite cast member this season..Ashley’s dog). As they strolled innocently amongst the dildos and ball gags, they were conveniently propositioned by the sexy store clerk, who complimented the couples’ “hotness”. She wanted to know if they would be interested in playing “Three’s Company”. Sophie passed the question to Rob, (As she was too young to understand the reference), wanting to see how he would answer. Rob refused a reply, throwing the question back to Sophie, claiming to be willing to go with whatever she wanted. Sophie was immediately offended, feeling like Rob should shudder at the idea of being with another woman, even if it was an additional adjacent woman, being that the two were getting married. They fought back and forth in the middle of the Pleasure Palace, as the prospective third party backed away slowly, rescinding the offer anyway. (I just think it’s funny that either of them think a third person could fit on the futon let alone in the “apartment”). 

Devin 2.0 & Nick-hoon:

It was the morning of the wedding, as Nick and Devin awoke, excited to get a move on. Nick was going through the checklist of things they would need, managing to ask Devin about the location of her wedding dress and….. Well, I have no idea what she said, because she mumbles so badly. As they headed to the wedding venue, Devin complained about her mom’s nagging, though she did seem to feel it came from a good place (And I only know this because I turned on the subtitles). 

Once in the bridal suite, Sister and Mother Devin were waiting anxiously, nervous to see if Devin would approve of her last minute gown. It appeared that the alterations and removal of all things gold were all Devin needed to “Say Yes to the Dress” (With subtitles, of course). 

In the groom’s quarters, Nick was really feeling himself as he got dressed in his traditional Hanbock. He and Father Devin stopped to have a heart to heart, where Nick became emotional, speaking sweetly about his bride to be. Father Devin was so verklempt that he almost forgot about the previous fat-shaming, as the two shared a special moment.

Then it was finally showtime. Nick waited patiently at the end of the aisle as Devin was escorted by her teary-eyed dad. The look and feel of the venue was modern-Korean chic; Tasteful but somewhat sparse, and luckily nothing pig-themed. After their beautiful ceremony, the couple enjoyed a dramatic kiss, more dynamic than either of them had seemed so far this season. They exited the venue, cheered on by their guests, and were surprised by a helicopter awaiting. Apparently this uncommon gift was courtesy of The Parents Devin, who earned their cool points by surprising the newlyweds with a sunset helicopter ride (And I now think Mother Devin should be the wedding planner for all 90 Day nuptials).

Mazel Tov to the happy couple! (I was going to get them a toaster, but I got them milk toast instead, because it made me think of them. But the wedding was nice…). 

Ashley & Manuel:

With the wedding date growing near, Ashley decided to go dress shopping with her mom and sister. She was in the market for a dress that conveyed her overall “vibe”, which she described as “Ethereal luxurious princess-mermaid with a hint of drama”. She tried on her top choice for the crowd, who seemed to love it, especially when topped off with a crown made of authentic crystals which Ashley felt promoted peace and tranquility (She’ll definitely need some of that). Though they were all ready to say “Yes to the dress”, Ashley’s mom and sister were not as jazzed about the sea slug she was about to marry. They worried that Manuel wouldn’t be able to be a good husband, as his communication skills were lacking. Sister Ashley was concerned about Manuel’s tendency to push back when facing questions he didn’t like, almost always running out with no regard for Ashley’s feelings. Mother Ashley insisted on having a sit down meeting with Manuel to discuss his plans for the future, and his intentions for their relationship.

Next thing ya know, Ashley was schlepping to a retro diner where Mother Ashley was patiently waiting. She dismissed Ashley as to have some alone time with her future son-in-law, relying solely on her phone’s Jihoon translator app to communicate. Manuel tried to explain his approach to life and conflict resolution, which consisted of the 3 S’s: “Silence, Stubbornness, and Sexo” (Which means….Oh well Kenny I think you can figure that one out).  He felt these methods worked best for Ashley’s explosive personality and uncontrollable attitude. Mother Ashley noted his techniques, but let him know that she expected him to be a man of integrity. Manuel of course just blinked through his greasy bangs, agreeing, as to end things so he could go home to watch a soccer game. 

Sam & Citronella:

As Sam and Citra headed home from the airport she looked out the window, taking in the sights. They finally arrived at Father Sam’s tiny house under the cover of night. The first stop on the house tour was Sam’s bedroom, where Citra seemed bothered by the messy state of affairs. She chalked it up to “#Boylife, as the tour continued. They bumped into Father Sam in the kitchen, where they had an awkward interaction, sure to be one of many. 

Sam led Citra to his brother’s room with the little kid sports DOO-vay, where he’d be sleeping, to avoid any pre-wedding corruption. Citra got a chance to unpack for a bit, pulling out the outfit she wanted Sam to wear to his conversation ceremony at the mosque, which came complete with a fun hat. Father Sam stood by looking puzzled, especially since he never received an invite to his son’s Muslim Bar Mitzvah (He didn’t have time to attend anyway… he was too busy examining the local crop circles and waiting for the mothership).  
Citra excused herself to go take a shower, before putting on her 1930’s night bloomers to get into bed, alone. Sam could hardly contain his excitement about having a real live girl in the house, though he claimed that Citra was the one making more comments about their “bang-bang” after the wedding day. 

The next morning, the couple greeted each other with a sensible hug and kiss on the cheek, as Sam admitted his “horniness” was at an all time high. Citra cooked up her first breakfast in her new kitchen, as the fly paper flowed freely from the crooked window valance. With her judgmental sisters coming to town, Citra knew she’d better help Sam clean out his trash can on wheels (aka his car) before the sh*t talking commenced. They hit up a local car wash, where she worked hard emptying papers and trash from the backseat. Seeing all of the paperwork made her question Sam about his status with the diversion program. Sam was finally forced to come clean about the situation, admitting that he was unsure of his fate, and may return to his jailbird status. He was hoping that Citra would stand by him no matter what (Which I’m guessing means she’d have to be willing to live in the flypaper kitchen with alien dad alone in between visitation days and filming for Love After Lockup). Poor Citra-ella needed time to process that her fairytale prince might have to live in a big house…with bars and toilet wine. Can’t wait until dad arrives!

Gee-Know & Jasmania:

Back in Miami…
Gino and Jasmine were ready to hit up the beach, as Jazzy J stripped down to her itsy bitsy bikini and leopard pirate DOO-rag (pronounced like DOO-vay). She was feeling so comfortable in new surroundings as they were so similar to life in Panama. Gino awkwardly rubbed sunscreen all over Jasmine, making sure to make creepy comments as he worked it onto her swollen butt implants, which were still tender to the touch. 

Jasmine mentioned that she’d like to get married on the beach, instead of in meat-locker-Michigan, and without the Family Gino in attendance. She was still upset about the way his family had treated her at their big meet up, feeling as though they had asked inappropriate questions and were suspicious of her motives. Gino felt that Jasmine was being too harsh with his family, as they were just concerned for his well being. Jasmine finally agreed to give the Family Gino one more meeting, where she would assess whether or not they would be allowed on the guest list. (I’m guessing Coco is going to be the Maid of Honor, Best Man, officiant, and witness all rolled into one).