Love After Lockup: Season 2, Episode 1

Angela & Tony:
WELCOME BACK, ANGELA AND TONY!
We are reunited with the two lovebirds outside of a romantic fire pit, where Angela is fixin’ to torch all of Tony’s belongings. She even removed her pipe fitting/wedding ring from her finger in a fot of rage. While Tony was sleeping, Angela pulled some CSI moves and removed the sim card from Tony’s phone in order to bypass his lock screen and check his messages to see if he was being faithful. Needless to say, after a series of questionable texts, Angela is sending him packing.

Michael, Megan Muh-Queen, & Sara:
WELCOME BACK MEGAN, MICHAEL AND SARA.
The beginning montage reminded me of just how terrible the ending to last season was. When we left off on our favorite love triangle, it was hinted that there was an additinal”female” blowing up Michael’s phone (obviously because he’s most eligible bachelor. I heard the network’s were in talks for him to actually be the next Bachelor).
Michael showed up to Texas looking frizzy to reunite with Megan and her Medusa hair and her bff, who let’s just say is not president of the Michael fan club. I think “B” and I could B friends.
Meanwhile, poor Sara is all alone with her two babies, having to make pretend “daddy” phone calls with Aviahna to make up for Michael’s absence (Kind of the saddest thing ever). Cant wait to see what these three are up to throughout the season.

Brittany & Marcelino:
WELCOME BACK!!!
Well it looks like Brittany is pregnant yet again!! This is really a miracle, being that her birth control was .9 or .1 or 10% effective (damn math!). I’m not sure how they are going to top the name “Zoila”, but they have a few months to figure it out. Giovanni seems excited to have a new cell mate to share his room with.

Andrea & Lamar:
WELCOME HOME!
Andrea is on her way to a “sip and see” for one of her Mormon friend’s baby. The music that they edited in is pretty funny if you noticed…its some clubby sounding song with words like “we’re gonna get turnt tonight….were gonna turn it up”, while Andrea is walking into a suburban home to do crafts and stare at a baby. I am CLEARLY living in the wrong state and religion, for that matter, as crafting and drinking iced tea is absolutely my idea of a fun Friday night! The only club I need to go to is club JoAnn Crafts! The ladies tell Andrea they think her relationship is doomed, since Lamar is currently living in L.A. and she moved back to Utah. At this point, Andrea redirects everyone’s attention to a different topic: the paternity of her youngest daughter. Apparently a prison guard was paid off to let Andrea and Lamar play “7 Minutes in Heaven ” in the prison closet, resulting in their daughter. I guess this is making the decision to let Lamar go much harder. It’s too bad she doesn’t like to smoke and gang bang, and that he doesn’t like to craft. I do think k they love each other, but where would they live?!