Shekinah & The Sarper Image: The twin flames touched ground in the US and partook in a little “PDA” (the one physical thing Sarper had never done with a woman, because…Turkey). After sucking each others’ faces off, they used their perfectly tanned and toned bodies to carry all of their luggage to the car and […]
This week began with the aftermath of Jasmine’s open marriage request. She cried, as the girls circled around to reassure her that she was still a queen, and definitely NOT a cheater, as Gino had claimed. They all piled into the vans to head back to the resort, with the group breaking up into the […]
Jessica & Juan-tanamer-ica: It was Juan’s first morning in Wyoming and Jessica made him a hearty breakfast of soggy eggs before inviting him to fertilize her own soggy eggs downstairs. Since the kids were out of the house, they decided to take advantage of their few and far between moments of privacy. After their lovefest, […]
Apparently since we last saw them, Rob and Sophie had some additional counseling which has allowed them to be in each others’ presence once again. They playfully jumped on top of each other outside in the courtyard in an attempt to demonstrate they could still have fun together. Later that evening, Stacey and Flo were […]
Mark & Mina: It was Mina’s first day in the US and she was feeling pretty bad about having to leave her son Clayton behind due to a complication with his passport. She and Mark called on video chat to reassure him that they would all reunite soon, though she herself wasn’t sure about the […]
This week kicked off with Darcey getting a little gym time in with “The Knob”, discussing her recent vaginal rejuvenation surgery (Rob didn’t discuss his. Too painful). Rob was under the impression he was listening to Stacey talk about her brand new vagina, when he realized it was her evil twin. Darcey explained the recent […]
Stevi & Mahdi: Stevi was preparing to pick up her groom-to-be from the airport, but was a bit nervous about her new roommate’s ability to adjust to her quirks. She claims to have terrible night terrors, hates wearing pants in the house, and has a touch of the OCD. As she drove down to New […]
After last week’s “primal scream” therapy, Stacey was complimenting Flo on his conflict resolution skills, which unfortunately only benefitted Natalie. FLOryda possessed a natural ability to tame the crazy eyed vixen, something he undoubtedly learned during his time with the Silvas. Stacey felt Flo-botomy should really be focusing his therapy skills on their own relationship, […]
Jessica & Juan: Returning from a previous season of “Love in Paradise” are Juan and Jessica….You know, the girl from “Cow Poop, Wyoming” and the Colombian cruise ship bartender who met on vacation and had a baby?? Well, they’re back, and we got a glimpse into Jessica’s life in Wyoming. Her two blonde sons played […]
This episode of The Last Resort began with the oddly shaped therapist pulling Brandon and Julia aside to discuss the recent “bombshell” Julia had just dropped. Brandon sobbed, feeling like he could have spent the rest of his life not knowing Julia had briefly lip-locked with her former KGB boyfriend 4 years ago, as he […]
