Author Archives: ericashmerica

Angela & Michael: Nigeria is a dangerous place……..but mostly just because Angela has landed!! Ignore the men with the guns and iron spikes, just steer clear of Angela and her man! The idea of Angela in a Nigerian prison sounds like the premise of a whole new reality show that I’d LOVE to watch. “Locked […]

Ben & Quinoa: Quinoa showed up wearing an outfit with very poorly placed buttons. I spent the first few minutes thinking her “headlights were on”. After discussing which of the 31 flavors the other probably tastes like and talking about Ben’s weird body hair, Quinoa announces he will be staying with her brother, Fidel. The […]

Rebecca & Zied: Rebecca wore a tank top and things got out of control. More importantly, I saw Zied blink like 3 times. All I can think about is the hygiene of smoking hookah. As Zied was gesturing with it wildly, I’m just wondering if the little mouthpiece gets washed? Disinfectant spray in between hookah-ing? […]

Rebecca & Zied: Zied’s hair is what actual nightmares are made of. When Rebecca was blow drying it, I dry heaved. I hope she rented the soccer mom van, seeing how she’s now the team mom. I cant believe she didn’t even bring them orange slices and Gatorade! It felt like Zied brought her to […]

Thank you 8lb 6oz golden baby Jesus- ANGELA is back!! She rolled back into our lives looking like an adorable angry pineapple with that extra straightened high ponytail. As someone who works in the wedding industry, I can only hope to one day get to be a preferred vendor for Doug, the wedding coordinator. His […]

Let’s start with Caesar and a picture of some girl: Between his odd shaped head, the meditating and the bike helmet, Caesar seems like the total package. I mean it’s obvious to everyone but him that this is a scam. Even the producers tried pointing things out to him and he just stared blankly. Svet […]