Jenny & Slumflea: After receiving the Parents Sunchips’ official statement of indifference last week, Jenny was excited to head to the family astrologer to figure out the couples’ long awaited wedding date. The astrologer consulted “the stars”, who gave the green light to get married in approximately 9 days (Pretty sure he just shook his […]
Author Archives: ericashmerica
Jenny & Stringcheese: Since the parental visit has been somewhat of a disaster, Scrapheap decided to call for backup by way of the family’s personal astrologer. They all sat down together to read their collective charts and try to get Mother Swapmeet to take things down a notch. The astrologer wasted no time letting Mother Smee […]
Steven & Alina:It’s finally time for Steven to have his social media-sectomy, as per Alina’s direct orders. Before the deed could be done, Alina took a gander through Steve-O’s DMs, only to find suspicious messages that looked a bit too friendly for her liking.Steven finally gave in to deleting his account, though the act did […]
Snorey & Evilone: Corey is all dressed up fancy like he has a court date, but in reality he has an actual date with the princess of Engabao herself, Evelin. After living it up with his frenemy Raul for a week, Corey decided to rent his own Engabao high rise, which came equipped with 2 […]
Steven & Alina: Mother Alina accompanied the kids to a nice outdoor cafe to sit down for lunch with a side of Mormon infomercials. Steven reminded the gals to refrain from ordering coffee, since the caffeine could give you the jitters, which could lead to involuntary skiddlypoop (or something, I wasn’t fully paying attention. So […]
Steven & Alina:Still stuck at the winery from last week, Alina is left trying to process the fact that someone else was willing to sleep with Steven. He shabbily tried to apologize for lying, while also revealing his romantic stats; First base with 100 girls, 2nd or 3rd base with 24, and scoring a home […]
Airela & Biniyam: Ari and Bini had a “let’s see who’s pants are worse” contest, as they dressed themselves to take baby Avi to the doctor. Even though Bini went with a mismatched outfit of tie dyed ripped jeans, Ari still won the contest. She was very on brand looking like she had dressed herself […]
Steven & Alina:Steven and Alina were strolling through their new hometown, which appeared to be straight out of Epcot. They needed to see an immigration lawyer to figure out the technical details of their immigration situation. Instead of calling Uber Turkey (which just sounds like a really large turkey…), Steven decided hitchhiking would be a […]
Corey & Evil-one: We picked up from last week, where Evilone was sitting in her 80’s Madonna wedding gown, dropping the bomb on her sisters that she and Corey had secretly gotten married the year before. She explained that like in most fairy tales, Prince Charming’s Visa was about to expire, and they hadn’t been […]
Karmando:Kenny headed off to retrieve Cassie, one of his triplet daughters, from the airport. They had a tearful reunion as he let her know his feelings about his move to Mexico. Truth be told, Kendoll is a bit homesick being so far away from his 4 kiddos and grandson. Cassidy also feels pretty sad about […]