90 Day Fiancé-The Other Way; Season 6 Tell All Part 2:

Part two of the Tell All began with Invisible Ing… in otherwords..Ingi has left the building. Sarper the mediator called Ingi privately to see if he would return to the big screen, without much luck. Ingmeister left his friend “Gummi” (pronounced “Goom-may”, which sounds more sophisticated than the worm or bear variety) to take his place. The entire cast, including Corona and her mom, sister, and grandmother all tried to get answers as to why Ingi had cut and run. The segment ended without much closure for Corona, who believed Ingi had broken up with her because he was way too immature to be with a woman who wears Spice Girl shoes on a regular basis.

Next in the hot seat was Sean, who’s seat is always considered “a hot seat” because….well…… Everyone was surprised to see he was stateside, as he revealed he had recently been approved for a green card. He hadn’t yet told his daughter Bella Rose about his recent change of address, and was hoping she would approve, though knew it was unlikely. Mother Joanne tuned in via satellite, who had now met Sean and understood the need for Joanne to repeatedly fly to Ireland. Shekinah felt like Mother Joanne was too meddling, and claimed she wouldn’t be open and honest if she was her daughter either, which sparked a fight between the butter-eater and the bagel eater (You don’t fight with an Italian Long Island mutha). Corona agreed, causing Shekinah to give her a tongue and inflated lip-lashing, before Shaun turned the attention to Joanne. She questioned why Joanne had kept her marriage a secret from all of the important people in her life, including her father, who still had no idea and was in the other room petting the dog and watching Wheel of Fortune, missing his big chance to be on t.v.

The cast took a break and headed back to the green room, where Shekinah and Sarper handed out their favorite snacks; Sticks of butter. James went ahead and took a giant bite, while Corona only licked the stick (obviously fermented shark was much more palatable).
Back on stage the attention moved to America and Turkey’s sweethearts. Shaun commented on Sarper’s unreal physique, which was shown on the screen from a text message he had sent to the mystery woman that had been brought on last week. Sarper claimed that he had only been in touch with this woman because she was a therapist, and Shekinah had insisted that he see one in order to continue their relationship. She unfortunately didn’t specify that he should be seeing a therapist that he hadn’t slept with (But I guess when your number is 2,500, finding that hadn’t “shrunk his head” was harder than not). They then discussed Sarper’s designer nose, and Shekinah’s alleged deflated filler-face. Shekinah seemed thrilled with her new noggin, and was willing to dissolve her face filler as per Sarper’s request (except the lips. She needs buoyancy in case a plane crashes and she needs an emergency floatation device). Their portion ended with some “never before seen footage” of the two eating some kind of phallic looking Turkish delicacy, with Sarper being his ever-entertaining self.

Next it was time for James and Metata, who were clearly mature and stable. Metallica had accused James of possibly cheating on her, because he had watched videos online of girls dancing in bikinis while he was on the toilet. James and the rest of the cast didn’t feel this was cheating, but all agreed it was gross, and now I’m just picturing him on the toilet.
Then it was time to wake Josh up and power on Lily’s “on” switch to see what’s been going on with them. Lily’s daughter Vivian came on to repeatedly ask Josh “Why you no f**k my mom??”, which is a totally normal question for any daughter to ask, especially on television. Josh tried to explain that the two were always fighting, which he still blamed on Lily and her inability to be a human. Lily smiled as she claimed to be terribly unhappy and detached from reality, and wanted a divorce. As the segment came to a close, Josh and his dopey face claimed he wanted to work on his marriage, with Lily putting on her best phony smile and agreeing. And I still want to ride in the elevator. As the Tell All came to a close, it appeared that Ingi was MIA with no info to give, Shekinah and Sarper are cooler than everyone, and Metata caused New York to experience an insurgence of rainfall from her tears. Josh and Lily are still deranged robots, and I hope Josh has to endure listening to Shekinah and Sarper slurp butter loudly for his punishment for being so bleh and annoying this season. Season 6 of The Other Way is officially categorically DONE AND DUSTED!