90 Day Fiancé; Season 10 Episode 12:

Rob the Knob & Dollar Store Daenerys Targaryen:

After a rather refreshing two week break from these two brain-drains, here we are. Sophie and Rob were back where we left them, fighting in the car over the staged “woman-at-sex-shop-inquiring about a threesome” fiasco. They seemed to come to some sort of understanding that although Sophie claims to be bisexual, she does not plan to explore things with the ladies, as she is committed to the Knob” (Which clearly was worth mentioning it in the first place). In return, Rob agreed not to bring up being open to the idea of having a threesome with any other women (Of course with the exception of his online cam girls). Good talk.
After making up, they went back to Rob’s hobble where they attempted to make dinner, which was really more of a fire hazard than any type of cuisine. As they sliced and diced their ingredients next to Sophie’s shoe rack, they discussed Mother Sophie’s upcoming visit. Rob felt like the timing couldn’t have been worse, as the couple were fighting daily and didn’t need a meddling mother to add to the drama. 

They later headed over to Mother Sophie’s hotel where she was over the moon about seeing her daughter….and underwhelmed at the sight of Rob. Mama Sophie (aka Claire) had a lot of questions about the couple’s possible upcoming wedding, which had yet to really be discussed on the show. Within the first few moments of the gathering, Rob managed to offend MamaSoph incidentally when he tried to make a witty comment, which he should probably never do, due to his lackluster personality. 

The following morning, Sophie styled Rob’s hair into the perfect high ponytail in preparation for her Mother’s first visit to their humble abode. Upon her arrival to Inglewood, they escorted Mum through the courtyard, which she found surprisingly charming (Broken fax machines, filing cabinets and all). Then with one swoosh of the mosquito netting, they entered the estate. Sophie’s mom was speechless as she tried to take it all in; The hanging tapestry, the overflowing closet coves next to the makeshift kitchen, the DOO-vay-less futon, etc. Unfortunately when she was able to finally articulate, she spared no words letting Rob know she was disappointed that he had failed to find a suitable living situation when he had so much time, knowing Sophie was coming to stay permanently. He also neglected to get a job in the interim, leaving the couple with very little options other than their outhouse shanty. Sophie meekly agreed with the obvious, leaving Rob on the defense. Of course this caused “The Knob” to throw a hissy-fit, spouting off about Sophie and her mother being of “the upper crust” and not knowing what it was like to be just plain crusty. 
The scene ended with Rob storming off, giving Mother Sophie a front row seat to one of his irrational tirades. 
(Doesn’t Prince Harry live in California now?? Can’t they just go stay with him? I’m sure Meghan won’t mind…)

GeeKnow & Jasmania:

Back in Miami…
Jasmine and Gino seemed to be getting along this week as they headed out for a night of salsa dancing. GeeKnow must have been secretly practicing his dance moves, as he finally stopped stomping on Jasmine’s toenails (Which I’m assuming are long, painted, and talon-like to match her claws).
The next day they took a walk along a pier, discussing bringing poor Juance to the US, where “Papa Gino” would be his “bonus dad” (And personal pizza chef). Even though Gino was on board to be stepfather of the year, he expressed his desire to have his own child.
Though Jasmine claims to be a proud mom, she has reservations about having another child, as her youngest son has special needs. She worried that a potential child with Gino might also have special needs (which is a very valid concern…it’s a pretty intense gene pool that kid would be swimming in). Gino still seemed game to try, reminding her that the baby would still be a person, and Papa Gino would always be there no matter what. Jasmine did her weekly sob, but this time it was out of happiness, as she finally felt pretty positive about the relationship, if only for an hour. Previews for next week show her working up the courage to tell Gino about her wealthy bunnafacor (That’s someone who pays for your bun-implants, and it’s her ex boyfriend “Den”, Kenny. I don’t think this will go well). Papa Gino is going to burn down the pizzeria over that one!

Sam & Citronella:

These two lovebirds seemed to have hit a rough spot already, as Citra was pretty mad about Sam’s potential jail stint. They discussed the situation while Citra whipped up an Indonesian meal in the kitchen, amongst the displayed fly paper (Which really tied the room together). She ultimately agreed to stand by her man, even if it meant becoming a prison wife, and hoped her father would be as understanding upon his arrival. To punish Sam for being a moron with his paperwork, she decided to rip him a new a$$hole….literally, because she used so many chilis in her cuisine that Sam was going to need to spend the rest of his time in the free world in the bathroom (Which hopefully had plenty of toilet paper… .and fly paper). 

The next day, Sam was luckily able to function and took Citra to finally meet his Mother. He tried explaining his mom’s unpredictable and explosive personality, letting Citra know that she tends to fly off the handle without warning. Due to her deep Christian faith, he also feared she might upset Citra by making snide comments about religion. Sam had previously had a strained relationship with his mother, but was hoping they could all get along for the sake of the upcoming wedding.
They arrived at the house where they were greeted by a very excited MamaSam (Deedee) and her mother, Trebeh (That’s “Tree-buh”, Kenny, and it’s not even Spanish but I thought you needed help anyway). Citra presented them with a plate of her finest fly-paper food, which they politely pretended to appreciate. Deedee had a few questions regarding Sam’s Muslim Bar Mitzvah/ Conversion ceremony, as well as their Muslim wedding, which she did her best to ask in the most sincere and polite way. Though Deedee confirmed she’d be attending, she explained her struggles with accepting her son’s change of faith, as she felt it was unfair to make him change his beliefs for the sake of a relationship (I wonder if she felt that way about Sam’s father and all of the alien talk, or if that was ultimately the cause of their divorce). The afternoon seemed to go really well, and Mother Deedee was calm, cool, and collected, all while wearing her “Rugrats” t-shirt (Always dress to impress). Citra questioned all of Sam’s cause for concern, feeling already like “One of the girls”. Hopefully Mama and GrandTrebuh have stronger stomachs than Sam…

Nikki Exotica & Igor Timberlake:

Back in the Moldy O…
After a semi- disastrous vacation to the Moldy vineyard, Nikki demanded that Igor take her home early. Nikki sulked, feeling devastated after finding out that Igor had been with other women after rekindling their relationship, and yet was still unable to perform his fiance duties in the bedroom. As they drove along, he proposed a solution to the couples’ sex problems; Maybe they should have a threesome. Nikki of course was enraged, as she listened to a monotone Justin explain his life long desire to unenthusiastically displease two women at the same time.
They finally arrived at his apartment, and Nikki attempted to sit JustIgor down for a serious talk (Which was made less serious by the fact that he was holding some kind of cartoon flamingo doll). Nikki explained her disinterest in participating in a threesome, as she had already been around the block in her youth. She once again overshared, going into full detail about all of the combinations and locations of her many lovers (And let’s just say you’d better bring a sleeping bag if you plan to stay in a hotel in Paris). Since she felt like sharing, she wanted Justin to let her know exactly how many women he was with since their reunion, and if he was still actively with any Moldy-maidens. Justin tried to low ball the number in an attempt to avoid a sharp nail to the jugular, as Nikki still seemed hurt that he was so unapologetic with his unfaithfulness. 
Mr. Timberlake felt it best to go spend some time talking with one of his friends, leaving Nikki alone to have some much needed girl-talk via video chat with her mom. Once Igor had left the building, Nikki filled her mom in on the current drama, including the threesome shtick. Mother Nikki reminded her living Barbie that she needed to make sure Igor was truly ready to settle down only with her and take on a more masculine role.
In the meantime, Justin also discussed the situation with his friend, explaining that he was still having a mental block getting over the fact that Nikki is trans, especially since he felt like she was displaying “masculine” energy. Justin’s friend agreed that he needed to be the more manly one out of the two, but reminded him that Nikki was justified for feeling jealous. 
It seems like this relationship has a lot of cracks in the foundation (Which is generally a common place for Mold to hide, and can be determined by a Mold restoration company. Moldy fun-fact of the week)

Ashley & Manuel:

Back at the witch’s den, Ashley surprised Manuel with a visit from his life long BFF, Jonathan, who now lives in NYC. Manuel actually looked genuinely happy for once as he warmly greeted Johnathan, who brought him a soccer jersey as a “Welcome to America” gift (Except it’s not soccer, Kenny, it’s “futbol”, and it’s confusing, I agree). Ashley wanted to give the old friends a chance to catch up, so she left them to wander around Rochester (Which is an Olympic sport by now for Manuel). They eventually sat at a bar to discuss Manuel’s nueva vida (That’s “New Life”, Kenny) and how things were going with Ashley. Though Manuel liked living with the bruja, he expressed his longing for Ecuador and all of his people (Probably including his wife and four children….). He also told Johnathan about Ashley’s spending habits, and his expectations that she would so generously support his entire family back home instead of buying overpriced crystals and all of the incense from Spencer’s Gifts. Jonathan tried to explain to Manuel his newly adopted American life, which came with an excessive shoe collection that could have fed his own family for quite some time (Not that they eat shoes, but I get what he means…). Manuel seemed to understand, but still felt that it was his new wife’s duty to help support his family who barely knew about her. 

The next day, Ashley joined Manuel and Jonathan at a coffee shop (You know Ashley’s love of being caffeinated…), as they rehashed the exact same topic that the friends had previously discussed. Ashley of course got heated feeling it was unfair that Manuel was trying to tell her what to do and how to spend her hard earned witch-dollars. She felt he was unappreciative of the fact that she had worked hard to bring him over on the K1-Visa and was currently paying for everything. Her witchy tantrum began to brew, as she started getting worked up and had to leave the table. (I’m sure Manuel will be able to calm her down by excusing himself to go diddle her in the bathroom. Problem Solving 101)

Clayton & Anali:

The couple were still in San Diego (That’s “The Whale’s Vagina”, Kenny….Well, according to “Anchor Man”, anyway) as a large notification spread across the tv screen letting the world know that poor Clayton had been 59 days without having sekks. Anali was still annoyed with his oversharing about their sex life (or lack thereof) during their first and possibly only double date, and opted to stay in a separate bedroom. Despite his frustration, Clayton made a huge breakfast for two, inviting Anali to join him outside. As they dined in the backyard, Clayton made it a point to apologize about his inappropriate dinner conversation, hoping it would score him some points and get him closer to scoring in general.

He then went off to spend the day with his now in-person BFF, Kameron. Feeling like he wanted to surprise Anali and add a little “wow” factor to their wedding. Clayton arranged a Peruvian dance lesson, hoping it would work as a mating call for his bride-to-be. Kameron was blown away as he watched his buddy’s moves (Which were not quite “Like Jagger”, Kenny… but they involved fun hats and very serious Zoolander faces). After the dancing/cardio commenced, Kameron tried to talk to Clayton about some of the red flags he saw in the couple’s relationship.
He felt it was strange that Anali had been keeping their relationship a secret from her father, as well as a lot of her family, especially since they had planned to get married. Clayton thought it all over, as they headed back to the house so Kameron could say his goodbyes.

The new in-person besties hugged it out before Kameron left, and they were glad to know their friendship was as tight in person as it had been for 13 years over their Nintendo or whatever it is they do for hours a day…
Being that it was the last night in the shmancy AirBnb, Clayton planned on cooking Anali a nice dinner to butter her up for his last chance at love. As he grilled up some steaks, he brought up the topic of Father Anali, still unclear as to why he wasn’t allowed to know about their relationship after 2.5 years. She immediately became defensive, crying, as she worried about her overprotective father’s reaction (Which is inevitable, being that he loves my recaps and reads them religiously, I assume). Needless to say the conversation and dinner were both short lived, as Anali stormed off to cry in her room (Hope she checked the closet first to make sure no one was living in there, because sometimes that happen