The OTHER Way; Season 5 Episode 6:

Karmando:

Ken Doll sat down to video chat with one of his triplet daughters to reminisce about the Florida heat. He was elated to hear he was going to be a GrandKen for the second time, which segued nicely into the baby topic of his own. His daughter inquired whether or not he had decided to make her a big sister. Kenny struggled, feeling like he was pretty much against the baby idea at this point, mainly due to his age (I mean he IS an abuelo to tres ninos, whether he understands what that means or not). Kenny grew very emotional, feeling like the large age difference between he and Armando was really showing when it came to this issue. He also felt upset about living so far from his kids and grandkids, and having a baby would make it even harder to keep up with everyone (And his skincare routine. Whatever he’s doing, he needs to teach classes).

Next on the agenda, Kenny met up with Armando, Hannita, and Mother Armando to go on a festive boat. They all seemed to be enjoying the relaxing ride, until Mother Armandy had to bring up the surrogacy clinic. Mother Armando (who copied/pasted her face on her son) asked if the couple had made a decision, which stirred up a lot of emotions. Amrando wept over the loss of his baby whom his ex wife was pregnant with when they both tragically passed away. Kenny felt horrible, wanting to help him move past that horrible memory by giving him the go-ahead on the baby making plan, but despite his excellent skin, was terrified that his age would be a huge factor. He felt that 60 was just a little too old to sire a baby, as he might not be around for most of the important times in that child’s life. Looks like the topic of making Baby Karmando happen is the focal point lately, and it has been nothing but a cry fest. Adios! 

Holly & Wayne the Drain:

Holly and Wayne went to check out some new places to live that would be safe from the “Load-Shedding Bandits” (They’re like the “Wet Bandits”, but Joe Pesci has a South African accent). Wayne was in his usual chipper mood, as he complained that looking at houses was just watching his precious time go down the drain (because….plumbing). He knew looking for a new place was pointless, being that he was unable to buy anything else at the moment. 

The two met with a realtor who showed them the first house, which was pretty cute and inside of a gated community with a very high electric fence. Holly staggered around the house doing her best Ozzy Osbourne impression, as she muttered all of the things she liked about it. She felt that house was a bit small, as she struggled to convert the size measurements, but did enjoy the “splashing” pool, and spacious master bedroom. The house came with a price tag equal to $113,000 U.S., which she found both reasonable and affordable, despite not knowing anything about Wayne’s financial situation.

They sat down with the realtor outside to go over more details, which of course sent the two into fighting. Wayne got moody discussing his finances, which he had kept to himself throughout his courtship with Holly. She became concerned about his ability to take care of her as promised, though she didn’t specify how and in what ways (Hitmen “take care” of people too, Holly. You need to be specific).

Back at the scary house, Holly ( who was wearing a braid crown) sat down with her mom to discuss the house hunting adventure. She admitted that they hadn’t yet found “the” house, but it wasn’t just a pipedream (because plumbers….). Holly then accompanied a very grouchy Wayne-O Drain-O to his office, while wearing a short, tight mini dress. She asked him to open up to her about the finances, only to find out he had spent 40k on cryptocurrency in the hopes that they would strike it big (and then get robbed, because load shedding….). Holly also learned that this investment meant the couple would be foregoing a honeymoon after their wedding, and was upset that she was out of the loop. She encouraged Wayne to let her in on things, as he sat in his desk chair, arms crossed, getting upset. Holly flew off the handle, running away like a hairy elf with anxiety, down the hallway and out of the safety of the electric fence into the wilds of Africa. Looks like this relationship is going down the drain fast (because…plumber).

Mary & Brandan:

Back in the Philippines…
“Babi & Babi” were strolling around the neighborhood hand in hand on their way to church. Mary was thrilled to show Brandan the ways of being a Catholic in her neck of the woods (Though I’m sure Nicola from “Before the 90 Days” would have liked it more. Meisha.)

Once at the church, she directed Brandan to look only at the priest and Jesus, but definitely not any girls. Brandan found himself bored throughout the church service, casually glancing around at his surroundings, only to be reminded by Mary that he needs to “behave”. He felt like her insecure and controlling ways were taking over his life, and something would have to change. 

Later that night (it must have been a REALLY long mass, because it was already night time…), Brandan sat down with Babi Mary to discuss her jealousy. He tried to reassure her that he gave up everything (including A.C.) to be with her, and was not going anywhere. Mary explained her abandonment issues stemmed from being left as a young child by her parents, as well as several other people that she had been close to. Brandan tried to comfort her, but she got so worked up she eventually started hyperventilating, which I’m sure we will see more of next week. I’d try to comfort Brandan during this difficult situation, but I can’t. I’m a girl….

Kirsten & Jewel-Iyo:

After the fairly disastrous trip to New Yawk, Kirsten met up with her friend Yara (Not the Jovi kind) to discuss the recent events. Apparently after she returned, Julio had told her that he was not going to be able to come to the Neitherworld in January, as planned since his mom forgot to sign his permission slip. Kirsten tried to be understanding, hoping he would be able to push it back a few more months, but it sounded like Jewl-ieie-o was set on staying home with his pizza and bagels. Kirsten’s friend Yara felt this was a jerk move and advised her to give him an ultimatum (Well, she said it was a “d!ck” move, but I didn’t want TJ and Kimbally to get in a fight again. Sensitive subject.) The two blond beauties finished up their conversation, concluding that Jewels better quit being a Klootzak lul and get with the program (That’s Dutch, Kenny, and it’s not nice).