Happily Ever After; S6 TELL ALL PT 2

Part two of the Tell All picked right back up with the intense Angela flash fest, and all of the reactions left in its wake. In true Angela fashion, she exited the stage after her display of anger and boobage, accompanied by Skyla, as their matching Madonna ponytails swayed in the breeze. Angela was convinced that Michael’s Aunt Lydia is the evil force trying to break them apart, as suggested indirectly by the Party City renowned psychic, Psychic Tracey.
The on stage psychologists/castmates were quick to weigh in on the situation, seeming to all agree that Aunt Lydia should not be so involved in the couple’s business. Michael scrambled to defend himself for not standing up to his Auntie, knowing Angela was going to once again announce she was “DONE”. Angela did, however, come back onto the stage to vaguely apologize for her outburst, while still maintaining her position on Aunt Lydia’s meddling ways. She was disappointed that Michael didn’t seem to stand up for her, and told him exactly where to go before collecting Skyla and giving everyone a back view of her clingy red jumpsuit as she exited stage left for the second time. Michael tried calling her via Facetime once she was backstage, but unfortunately she was more interested in “Meemaw Takes Manhattan” instead of chatting.

Next up were Libby and Undrrrrei, who jumped into discussing the current status of the family business. Libby sat in her Hefty cinch sack dress, as she gushed over the new close relationship between Chuckles and her Moldy husband. Shawn dug into the topic of Undrrrrei opposing Elizabeth’s request for a babysitter, which inspired Yara to give her 2 cents about being uncomfortable with a stranger watching her kid. Of course this made Libby incredibly defensive, as she squirmed in her trash bag, and tried to defend her point of view in her most nasal superior voice she could conjure up.
They then brought out Chuck, the original Pot(hast) stirrer. He tried his best to play all of the angles while also making himself seem innocent. Sister Jen came in via satellite to complain about her father’s involvement with Undrrrrrei. She was slightly shocked that production played the clip of she and Sister Becky talking about starting their own rival flipping business: “Shmotthast Flippy Dippy Industries”. Just to make things more annoying, cue Charlie, coming out with his “water bottle” full of “water” so he could win the drinking game where he had to take a shot every time someone said the word “bro”. (Spoiler alert; He won.)
Baby Chuck and Undrrrrei sat next to each other on the loveseat, going back and forth over who started the BBQ brawl. Asuelu tried to chime in with his thoughts on the BBQ fight intiation, so they just gave him a coconut and told him to make a Tiktok video as a distraction.
Basically, it went like this : Whine, whine, bro, whine, moldy accent equivalent to saying “bro”, whine, complain, bro, repeat.
Charlie maintained that his bro in-law came into the picture and ruined the bromance with the whole family, who were on 90 Day Broance. His favorite actor is Josh Bro-lin, he likes to wear bro-cade, and his sister draws her eye-bros on too thick. The end. 

Next up were Jovi and Yara, reliving their wild night at the strip club. Jovi maintained that he was just trying to have a night out on the town, while the rest of the cast (namely Undrrrrei), pointed out that taking a postpartum mother to a strip club for your anniversary may not have been the wisest move (even if production asked you to and said please). Mama Gwen came on to show up for team Yara, claiming her son needs to put his party boy days behind him before he ends up saying “Bro” with his water bottle like Charlie.
Yara shocked everyone when she announced that there could be a Baby Mylah 2.0 brewing, since she still hasn’t had her period or discovered contraceptive. Of course this big news caught everyone’s attention, especially Kalani, who is still dealing with having 3 babies back to back (Oliver, Kennedy, and Asuelu).

Speaking of Kalansuelu, they had a nice little debate about Asuelu’s idea of moving the family to Sam-wa, which was a big negative from Kalani. She feels that his true motive for wanting to move home would be to teach her how to be a “real Samwa” woman like his mother (which I’m assuming means getting an underbite and mustache and shaking your kids down for money). Kolini came onto the stage wearing Angela’s recycled red jumpsuit (the budget was tight for the Tell All…they didn’t even have enough to get her a ponytail). They also brought in Mother Asuelu and UFC champion Tammy to spice things up. Kalani still resents the Family Asuelu for getting rowdy at Christmas to the point where Asueluclaus had to escort them out like Steve Wilkos back in the Jerry Springer days. Tammy insisted that Mother Asuelu was right for suggesting that her son find another wife, since Kalani’s baby factory seemed to be temporarily closed for business. Yara tried to get Tammy to pipe down, which made her the newest target of Tammy the Tornado. Natalie, who had stayed mostly quiet, chimed in to agree with Tammy (since most villains only like other villains) that you should always respect your mother and defend her no matter what. (That is…. Unless your mother calls someone a Whoo-ker. Then forget it.) There was some debate over who pushed who out of the house during that fateful Christmas Eve, but a few seasons ago, I definitely saw Mommy Asuelu kissing Asueluclaus. 

They wrapped up the festivities by asking Mike and Natalie to confirm the end of their ridiculous relationship. The big guy was the first to confirm the split, while Natalie mostly stared at him eerily, smirking and squirming around in her seat. Natalie agreed that they were done, and I wish her all the best in her future career as a Lifetime movie villain.
That concludes this entire never ending season of Happily Ever After. See you again on the other side, (or The Other Way, which starts next Sunday!!) Sooo Maaaach 90 Daaaaays.