Recapper vs. Reviewer

Dear M. Jones M Jones,

Although I do enjoy your wedgie at the beach, I think I need to explain a few things to you. First of all, I am not an Amazon reviewer. I don’t research products and test them out to give advice to the average shopper. I am a REALITY RECAPPER, which is far more important and helpful to society. Now go back to scratching yourself or splashing in the waves, or whatever you were doing.

Sincerely,

E Shmerica E Shmerica